This feels so true, Molly. It’s so hard to do whenyou have important decisions to make with a time limit, when you feel your options are limited and you’re not liking any of them. Wish there was a button I could press to settle myself down!
This week’s video acknowledges how it can feel hard to settle down in urgent situations, but in fact, urgency does not need to ramp us up. When we see that being ramped up is a function of our thinking about the situation, not the situation itself, we recover the capacity to see clearly and act from a settled down place even when there are only seconds in which to make a life or death decision.
A riff on two of my favorite quotes:
“There is no such thing as work-life balance. Everything worth fighting for unbalances your life.”
~ Alain de Botton
“Balance is the new girdle.” ~ Jennifer Louden
As a coach I work with a handful of special clients to understand the spiritual principles behind the human experience so that they can reliably access and trust their creative intelligence and take bold action in service of their dreams. You can learn more and request an interview here.
Nobody wants to miss out on an opportunity, whether it is for true love, adventure, new business–whatever.
But you actually can’t miss out unless you lock on.
Here’s what I mean.
We tend to think of opportunities as if they exist out in the world. But opportunities are a function of thought.
When you recognize an opportunity (it takes shape as a thought), you construct a virtual reality around it. Then you hold that reality in mind while you walk around inside it, testing possible scenarios and weighing the consequences of each.
That’s an amazing human capacity, and it’s incredibly rewarding when you’re in a spacious and creative frame of mind. But when you’re afraid of missing out, making a wrong move, or overlooking a ramification, it’s exhausting.
And it leads you to a dead end.
The more you fear missing out on an opportunity, the more you lock on, putting more and more of your attention onto that tiny subset of possibilities. Because that’s all you see, you start to believe that’s all there is.
You know you’ve locked on when your thinking gets muddier as the stakes skyrocket and your options shrink. The more important it becomes that you get this right, the less clear you are about what you should do.
You can’t think your way out of virtual reality lock-down. But you can recognize that you thought your way into it.
You can take off the goggles and headset.
You can relax and know that as your mind quiets and your mood lightens you’ll naturally see new possibilities.
In a universe of infinite potential, there’s just no such thing as an opportunity too important to miss.
Photo Credit: John Nicholls via Flickr
When I was a senior in high school my true love was a sophomore in college. That was back in the day when long distance calls were expensive, and we wrote piles of earnest letters full of angst and idealism.
One day I received a letter that signaled the beginning of the end of the relationship. That was the letter in which my boyfriend announced how many children we would have and what we should name our first son.*
This week the ezine goes live with a NO COST Not-So-Quarterly Accidental Entrepreneurs Community Call. The topic is productivity and motivation, also known as taking control of your time. Here’s a quick-and-dirty synopsis of what I’ll be sharing.
The truth is, we can’t control time. Duh. But we have great steaming gobs of choice over how we structure it. The problem is that structures can be difficult to design, hard to maintain, and just plain boring. (more…)